Want to watch a horse diagnose CEO disease?

Ok, this is just plain funny. If you remember that old Hans Christian Anderson fable, “The Emperor’s New Clothes,” (and I’ll just bet you do) . . . and if you’ve ever spent any time in or around a corporate setting, you’ve most likely seen firsthand the condition some business analysts call “CEO Disease.”

This is a rampant condition where no one in the workplace is willing, for fear of reprimand, political fallout, or worse, job loss, to confront an ineffective or counterproductive leader. Instead, they just follow along, doing their tasks as assigned, and at the same time, each doing his or her part in letting the company drift from its core purpose.

I have been fascinated in recent conversations with HerdWise CEO Kathy Taylor about how equine assisted learning can reveal the dynamics of work teams, uncover surprising blocks to productive relationships that hinder corporate leaders, and even demonstrate in an unforgettable way how different leadership styles are needed to meet the needs of the team and the objective of the task at hand. By mimicking the energy of a leader, horses mirror workplace dynamics in graphic, unforgettable and often, humorous ways.

But by far the funniest and most telling thing I ever saw was this video of a CEO “leading” his team in their effort to get Kathy’s therapy horse, Roxy, over a pole in the center of a pen. This is especially funny if you know that Roxy has no qualms about walking over that pole. It’s a task she often does easily and willingly. But she clearly sees though this guy and no amount of “leading” — or coaxing or cajoling (and I believe there might have even been a trail mix bar bribe involved) will get Roxy over that pole.

Watch also how his team follows him around and defers to his ineffective antics. One lady gives a half-hearted attempt to support his effort by trying to block Roxy from leaving, and she even tries to reinforce his instruction by pointing the way they want Roxy to go. This is clearly a work team accustomed to following its leader, even when what he’s doing is not accomplishing the team’s overall goal.

Thoughts, anyone? Humorous narration? Funniest narrative comment gets a free t-shirt!

Happy Trails!

Thank you, Dallas Morning News, for a great job portraying The Smart Woman’s Guide to Midlife Horses! Read it at http://dallasne.ws/qjHmBn

by admin Book info Midlife News Projects The Smart Woman's Guide to Midlife Horses

A big thank you to Dallas Morning News Writer Kathleen Green and Pulitzer Prize Winning Photographer Robert Hart for this week’s Dallas Morning News My Town feature that highlighted The Smart Woman’s Guide to Midlife Horses. What I love most about Kathleen’s story (notwithstanding her exposure of my fairly serious (and obvious) Mexican food addiction and my enthusiasm for horse shopping at Teskeys) is that she really gets what this book is truly about — and the amazing power of embracing any midlife dream as an antidote to the sense of ennui that can settle in on all of us at this pivotal time of life.

What’s your dream? When you were young, what did you think you would always get around to doing — someday? Whatever it once was, I’d be willing to bet it’s still there. Really. Look under that pile of outgrown clothes, in the bottom of that overflowing junk drawer, or wedged between the post-it notes on your exploding calendar or bulletin board. You’ll find a hint of it.

Yes, for me it has always been horses that capture my imagination. But as the chapters of this book reveal, horses are really just a metaphor for anything that brings us a sense of freedom, a proverbial breath of fresh air, right here in the middle of our lives. It’s time to win independence over the day-to-day minutia that creeps in and takes over while we’re busy taking care of others and doing what we’re “supposed” to be doing as responsible adults.

Now don’t get me wrong. I’m all about being responsible and doing what we need to do. These are by no means mutually exclusive ideas. However, it is only when we embrace this natural midlife pause to reflect on our earlier dreams (whatever they are!) that we realize the opportunity is still there for us, on some level — and our dream is still waiting patiently for us to walk into the corral our subconscious built for it and make the decision to reclaim it.

What are you waiting for?

Rio_facing_LoRes — Saddle Up! Your Midlife Horse is Waiting!

Happy Trails!

Special thanks to Rick Lamb for a delightful radio interview and an enlightening male perspective on my book!

by admin Book info Midlife News Projects The Smart Woman's Guide to Midlife Horses Women and Horses

What a pleasure it was to talk with Rick Lamb on his radio show, “The Horse Show with Rick Lamb” about The Smart Woman’s Guide to Midlife Horses. Although I had never actually talked with Rick before, his reputation as the quintessential nice guy preceded him, and I’ll say I now fully agree with that assessment!

We covered a lot of good ground in our hour-long conversation, and even though after talking to so many women about this subject it was a little funny at first to discuss the whole midlife thing with a man, I’ll have to admit that I may have made a small tactical error. Somewhere in my assumption that the search for meaning, magic and mastery with the help of midlife horses is a phenomenon particular to Baby Boomer women, I think I got caught in my own stereotype!

As Rick pointed out, the Baby Boomer generation(s) are also chock full of men who are now finding their thrill and chasing their own forgotten horsemanship dreams. And, for many of these men, the issues horses help resolve are strikingly similar! Rick’s book, Human to Horseman, chronicles his own midlife horse journey, much as I did mine, so if any of you are looking for a view of the midlife horse experience from the male perspective, you ought to check this one out at www.ricklamb.com! Also, you’ll find several references to Rick’s earlier book, written with Dr. Robert Miller, DVM, called Revolution in Horsemanship within the pages (and listed in the resources) of The Smart Woman’s Guide to Midlife Horses.

If you’d like to hear this great conversation for yourself, just click here to visit Rick’s site. And, while you’re there (and to access all his great radio and TV shows and take a look at an impressive array of other books and products), be sure to sign up for a free membership! This site is a great resource for all kinds of horse information and entertainment — a place to visit often just to see what he’s up to!

Go give it a listen and let me know what you think — and if the interview sparked any follow up questions you’d like to ask either of us, please feel free to post your comment here and I’ll be sure to get back to you with a good answer!

Happy Trails!

Want to develop some mad core strength? Trot around for two hours on a snippy horse. Lather, rinse, and repeat.

by admin Midlife News Projects The Smart Woman's Guide to Midlife Horses Women and Horses

Just got back in from a two hour ride that turned into four — and grueling trot-a-thon on Trace and a bend-o-rama on Rio that has my core muscles quivering like Santa’s legendary bowlful of jello. You just never realize the need for well-developed core strength until you’ve trotted around in circles for two hours on a snippy horse, followed by another hour and a half on my passive aggressive sweetie pie that much prefers leaning to bending, whose cantering is more like a ride on Six Flags Over Texas’ Runnaway Mine Train than the slow, easy circles of my dreams.

Hobbling back to the cool comfort of my twirly desk chair, I just decided to go back and re-read Chapter Four, “Leg Up!” of my recently released book, The Smart Woman’s Guide to Midlife Horses . When I was writing the book, I realized through countless conversations with other women like me that one of the biggest challenges to midlife horsemanship is getting and staying fit to ride. Not only does this kind of conditioning make sense for improving our overall health and wellbeing, but when it comes to riding and working with our horses, it is crucial to be strong enough to be effective, keep ourselves safe, have a good time, and above all, keep coming back for more!

And, perfectly timed with today’s epiphany, there was a nice reference to this chapter on Rebecca’s TSB Riding Adventures July 27 blog post, titled “The Working Rider’s Workout,” as she prepares for a Wyoming Ranch ride (Yee Haww, Becca! You go, girl! I just learned the other day that dressage is like crack–more on that later– and I can’t wait to see if Becca finds the same is true about chasing cows!) Let’s stay tuned to this one and see how it comes out!)

Any others of you out there have a neat destination ride planned this year? Let us hear from you! We love to be inspired — and sometimes, live vicariously. Also, look for my upcoming post on some great fall rides I just learned about from a new friend who has personally done them all and can give us some great inside information on a surprising “trail culture” cropping up out there for trail enthusiasts across the nation.

And, as for getting that “core of jello” I’m sporting these days a little more solidified so I can be more effective in future trot-a-thons and bend-o-ramas, stay tuned for more info and exercises as I go back this coming month and revisit (and actually consistently DO) all those great core building exercises I tucked into Chapter Four of The Smart Woman’s Guide to Midlife Horses. Anyone out there want to do them with me? Anybody up for a little spirited “core building competition?”

Let me hear from you!

Happy Trails!

Meet Kendra and her horse, Topper, the horse formerly known as Lyle. Why the name change? She asked, he answered. The rest, is mind-opening history.

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Ok, now we’re going to step off the trail into an area many of you may think is just plain weird. Others may theorize that I’ve fallen on my head one too many times without a helment. Still others — and this, I think, may be the fastest growing group of horse enthusiasts out there — will know (on some level) exactly what I’m talking about.

The topic? Animal Communication.In Chapter 13 of The Smart Woman’s guide to Midlife Horses, I tell a story about Kendra and Topper.

In a nutshell, Kendra and her horse, which she called “Lyle” were consistent high performers in Western Pleasure. Then Lyle just quit performing. Wouldn’t work, didn’t try, all the spark was gone. Kendra ruled out all the usual causes and finally, although skeptical (she was a law student, need I say more?) consulted an animal communicator. The communicator told her, among many other amazing things, that her horse preferred the name, “Topper.” Curious about this, Kendra went back through his pedigree and indeed, found several versions of “Topper.” She changed Lyle’s name to “Topper” and he immediately returned to his old showy self.

I thought this was an interesting story when I first heard it. And I’m just woo-woo enough to realize that there are lots of things going on in the world we don’t fully understand or realize. And it is a well-known fact that we don’t even use a fraction of all our brains come hard-wired to be able to do. But the more I dug around in the subject — mostly during my own frustration with my horse’s unexplainable misbehavior, the more people I began to turn up who know and acknowledge that indeed, our horses do have a lot of things to tell us, if only we learn how to listen.

With the release of the recent movie “Buck,” a documentary on the life and times of legendary “horse whisperer” Buck Brannaman, interest in the topic of “horse whispering” is enjoying a revival. However, as anyone who has ever had a close relationship with a horse will tell you, this is not a new idea. The big news here, I think, is that animal communication is not something only a few people are gifted with.

That’s right. I’m going to climb right out on this limb. Don’t saw it off just yet. It turns out we all have this ability — and it’s been there waiting for us to “discover” for a very long time . In fact, experts I interviewed for The Smart Woman’s Guide to Midlife Horses (Chapter 13, “From the Horse’s Mouth”) agreed that this very special connection between human and equine consciousness goes all the way back to ancient times. Early Greeks and Celts all knew of — and celebrated— this wondrous connection.

The type of communication we have with our horses can vary wildly, depending on the human and, I suppose, depending on the horse. On one end of the spectrum, there’s the innate sense of “feel” all the great horsemen and women will tell you is crucial to success with a horse. On the other end, well, there are some who are able to have full-blown, Mr. Ed style mental exchanges with their horses and other animals that are no different than some of the conversations we have with each other. I know. It’s a little weird. And it sounds like some kind of Dr. Doolittle fantasy, but by now I’ve talked with enough of these folks — and been shocked enough at their accuracy — that I know there’s something to it. I think it is also an ability everyone comes hard wired with, but the degree to which we can access it varies with other factors no one can quite identify. Which is a fancy way of saying I have no idea why some people can do it and some can’t. And for so many others, like me, we know it’s there, but it’s just a little bit beyond our current mental reach.

The trick, most animal communicators agree, is learning to quiet our chattering minds enough to “dial in” this frequency (or “feel” if you’re going with the traditional explanation for this phenomenon), much the same as we used to “dial in” a radio station (another marker of midlife is remembering radios and TVs with knobs). For some people this “signal” is clear and stong, like a static-free top FM station blaring through your speakers. For others it is a faint, warbly connection that drifts in and out like that distant city station when you’re winding your way along dusty rural roads.

Want to know more? Check out the animal communication resources in the back of the book, or post a comment here, on Facebook, or reply on Twitter — and let’s start a conversation! It seems like everyone who understands that this communication is going on all the time whether we are aware of it or not has a different way of experiencing it, a different way of “dialing it in,” and some great stories to tell about what they learned “from the horse’s mouth.”

Happy Trails!

Jana’s vet told her to treat her horse just like she treats her husband. What could THAT possibly mean?

by admin Book info News Projects The Smart Woman's Guide to Midlife Horses Women and Horses

If there’s one thing certain in the great big horse world, it’s that there are plenty of people around to tell you what to do. Some of them will be right. Some won’t. And, while what this vet was advising did, in a somewhat quirky way, apply to correcting what Clinton Anderson would call “tiptoeing around” her horse from this normally strong and assertive woman, this is not necessarily the kind of thing you’ll find in horsemanship textbooks.

Or will you?

The truth is, there are many different ways of presenting the same information. And, since everyone hears and processes information differently, what strikes a chord with one person may fall flat with another. That’s why you have to learn, above all, the way you learn this horsemanship thing best — and then go find the people and information that resonate with your understanding, ability, personality and learning style.

Where do you find your best answers? How do you locate the people who can help you learn whatever you need to learn on this spectacular midlife trail? In addition to the wagonload of resources and suggestions you’ll find in the back of my new book, The Smart Woman’s Guide to Midlife Horses, be sure to check out Chapter 11, “Picking Up the Correct Lead.” (In case the cleverness of this title escapes you, this chapter has nothing at all to do with cantering — and everything to do with finding the advice and instruction that works best for you.) No matter where you are on this journey, the key to successful midlife horsemanship is finding those riding buddies, instructors and clinicians that meet your needs and have your best interests at heart.

Did the vet’s somewhat wonky advice work for Jana? ”

“Well,” she reported to him at his next visit, ” I did what you said. I took my stick home and when my husband started to ignore me, I stepped right in front of him and spanked the ground with my stick. And you know what? He’s not speaking to me!”

The vet, nonplussed, just looked at her. (If only I had a picture of the look on his face) Sometimes even good advice — and the best of intentions — can backfire. The good news here is I’m about 80% sure Jana was pulling his leg.

What’s the craziest advice you’ve ever received that actually made sense to you, changed your thinking, and got a result you’ve been looking for?

Free Saddle Up Your Midlife Horses! t-shirt to the first three responders!

Happy Trails!

Are my shorts on upside down? Ten years ago, this same pair was tight in the legs and big in the waist. Midlife can be so cruel.

by admin Midlife News Projects The Smart Woman's Guide to Midlife Horses Women and Horses

Midlife Horses_FRONT COVER_LORES — by Melinda Folse (formerly Melinda Folse Kaitcer) Order it now at www.horseandriderbooks.com!

What’s up with this change in my body structure that, number one, confirms I have entered that “certain age” and, number two, means twiggy legs and flappy triceps can’t be too far behind? Is this cruel reshaping really necessary? Unavoidable?

“NO!” Say the experts I consulted to build Chapter Four of my new book, The Smart Woman’s Guide to Midlife Horses. This chapter , entitled “Leg Up!” deals with the specific conditioning required to be effective with a horse — and, incidentally, could quite easily put us int he best shape of our lives.

The nice thing about this “exercise program” is that our horse chores are such necessary tasks we often don’t realize what a workout we’re getting. With a little awareness and a tiny bit of tweaking of our “horsekeeping” routines, we can be on the road to rock-star fitness without even realizing it. (This reminds me of a stretch of time when I was desensitizing Trace to the saddle by throwing it on him 100 times a day. If he hadn’t gotten bored with it and given up his goofiness, I could have had an upper body like Wonder Woman!)

And beyond the obvious fitness benefits that ride the coattails of barn chores like tossing bales, toting water buckets and mucking stalls, guess what else is packed quietly into this sneaky midlife fitness regimen?

Check out these Chapter Four factoids:

An hour of trotting burns 400-600 calories (in your body, not the horse’s!)

Mounting a horse uses every single muscle in your hips and legs

Just sitting on a horse simulates an extended squat, constantly working quads, hamstrings, abductors and aductors — simultaneously!

(I didn’t see any stats on how many calories sitting on a bucking horse burns— not to mention yanking him in circles until we’re both a bit dizzy— but I know it has given me jaw muscles like a pit bull. Probably not a good thing.)

So with all this fitness in mind, I’m off to the barn to ramp up my routine (in what they’re calling the second hottest Texas summer on record. I try not to pay attention to the counters, but I think I heard this is the 16th straight day of 100+ degree heat.) Maybe copious sweating will help right these upside-down shorts.

So . . .Fitness after 50? Just another gift we receive at the hooves of our midlife horses! I’ve included in the book a number of ideas for making the most of this built-in (if a little unwitting) fitness program, from specific exercises I discovered to interesting ways of combating this disturbing “flab phenomenon.” I’ve shared what I found to get motivated enough to reap yet another surprising benefit of the midlife horse experience. Now it’s your turn.

I know I didn’t even scratch the surface of good ideas in this area. What’s your horse fitness strategy? If you have any good fitness amping tips, suggestions or strategies, please share them with the growing Smart Womans Guide to Midlife Horses Community! Just post a comment in reply either here on this blog, on our Facebook page, or via Twitter or LinkedIn. And, if you have a photo or video of some good horse-related fitness routines or strategies, send them to me and I’ll post them on Flickr or our You Tube channel! Camera phones welcome! It’s all about helping each other keep it right side up!

Thanks, Dallas Morning News, for a fun interview and shoot! Look for the story in Our Town July 25!

by admin Book info News Projects The Smart Woman's Guide to Midlife Horses

It’s a darned good thing I didn’t know that was a Pulitzer winning photographer taking my picture this morning to go with Kathleen Green’s upcoming Dallas Morning News Article featuring The Smart Woman’s Guide to Midlife Horses. THAT would have made me nervous. But quite to the contrary, our early morning photo shoot with crackerjack photographer Robert Hart was nothing but fun!

The horses behaved admirably, the blistering Texas heat had yet to fully wake up for another 100+ degree day day, and I’m not sure, but I think Robert got some photos he liked. (He said that when a photographer makes the “ooh oooh oooh” monkey noise, it’s a good thing. Did I mention he won a Pulitzer? Although I’m fairly camera shy and highly self-critical, I’m guardedly optimistic about this one.)

As one not accustomed to being on this side of the interview or camera, I’ll have to say it was a little weird at first. But, just like the Horse Radio Network “Horses in the Morning” radio interview last week, once I get started talking about The Smart Woman’s Guide to Midlife Horses, all weirdness faded into my genuine enthusiasm for sharing this book.

You know the best thing about writing this book? Because it came from my own personal midlife horse quest — and because I built it to be a resource guide for readers to use as a springboard for finding their own answers, the ideas, connections, and useful information just keeps flowing my way!

That’s why I’m so glad we’re building this comunity — a gathering place where we can all pool our ideas, stories and experiences — and just generally bask in the fun and camaraderie the whole Midlife Horse experience can bring! (I’m looking into adding a virtual margarita machine . . .)

If you haven’t done it already, please visit (and “Like”!) our Facebook page and join the conversations growing there! Id love to hear from you any time something on this blog strikes a familiar chord — and, if you have pictures of you and your horse, advice to share, funny video, or favorite quotes, if you send ’em, I’ll post ’em! We’ve built an exciting social media hub that includes this blog, Facebook, Twitter, LinkedIn, YouTube, and Flickr.

Tell your friends! Come back often! Happy trails!

Just interviewed by the Horse Radio Network’s Horses in the Morning Show. Who knew being on live radio could be such fun?

by admin Book info News Projects The Smart Woman's Guide to Midlife Horses

I have a new favorite radio station. It’s an Internet station (who knew?) called the Horse Radio Network. If you, too, are among the horse obsessed, go check it out immediately! These people have way too much fun talking about all things horses and beyond— all day, every day!

In preparing for this morning’s interview on their Horses in the Morning Show, which they describe as “The first live morning show with an equine theme. A light, lively, entertaining daily look at the horse world and the people in it. Hosted by Glenn the Geek and Jamie Jennings and produced by Jennifer H. The show will include entertaining conversation, out of the ordinary guests, numerous regular horse related segments, listener call in, contests, giveaways and so much more.”

SO, I clicked back through a few of their archived programs (I heartily recommend this, by the way), and to my delighted surprise, I completely lost track of time in the most fun research I’ve had since attending Clinton Anderson clinics! (If this horse thing doesn’t work for Clinton, I’m pretty sure he has a solid career waiting for him in stand-up comedy.)

Scrolling through past Horses in the Morning shows, I laughed at the horse situations I related to all too well (especially Jamie’s BAD day), got ideas of where to look for better deals on horse stuff, got a great gazpacho recipe (barely fit the hot pink Post-it note I hastily scrawled it on), picked up a few horse business marketing tips (not that I’m in the horse business, per se, but I am trying to reach the same audience with this book!), and generally got that “barn time feeling” without leaving the cool comfort of my twirly desk chair (it IS 110 Texas degrees out there, y’know)

When you visit this great fun and informative Internet radio network, you can listen to my recent interview about The Smart Woman’s Guide to Midlife Horses and see how I did! They really liked the book, I think. It was my first radio interview and I was plenty nervous to start with, but Glen and Jamie put me at ease almost immediately and the next thing we knew we were just talking about midlife horses — my favorite subject!

If you do go listen to this interview and have any feedback, questions, or suggestions for me for future interviews, post your comment, along with your mailing address and email and I’ll send you a limited edition Saddle Up your Midlife Horses! T shirt.

Happy Trails — and Midlife Horse Lovin’ Cheers to the Horse Radio Network!

The magic of this midlife horse thing? On a good day, it feels like the look on a baby’s face when he tastes chocolate for the very first time.

by admin News Projects The Smart Woman's Guide to Midlife Horses Women and Horses

Meet Teresa, (pictured here with her midlife horse, Lladro). It was on a quiet morning ride, when Trace and I were the only other ones at the club, that we began to mimic, in follow-the-leader fashion (at a respectful distance on the far end of the arena, of course), Teresa and her beautiful and majestic Fresian through their daily dressage maneuvers.

070_70 — Here's Teresa and Lladro enjoying one of those "first chocolate" midlife horse moments . . .

We botched them all, of course, as neither of us knew what the hell we were even trying to do, but in the process (and in Teresa’s charitable kindness) a friendship was formed over our midlife horses.

As we rode along afterwards together (with Lladro casting a disdainful but tolerant eye toward Trace) it was our discussion of what our midlife horses mean to us that actually sparked the exploration that, three years later, became my soon to be released book, The Smart Woman’s Guide to Midlife Horses: Finding Meaning , Magic and Mastery in the Second Half of Life.

004_4 — . . . and here, modeling the kind of “I’ll scratch your back if you’ll scratch mine” relationship we all hope for with our midlife horse!

Teresa was giving me the 411 about the Fort Worth Horseshoe Club where I had just moved Trace. “We have the cleaners — they come out every day and clean their stalls their buckets their feed bins. Their stalls are cleaner than my house. We have the groomers, they come out and shampoo, brush, apply hoof dressings and keep their horse looking like a million bucks. We have some that stay pretty much on the ground, others who take a lot of lessons, some ride just for fun and others are very serious competitors — or used to be. There really is something in this experience for everyone!”

“What do you think it is about horses that attract women at this time of life?” I asked in what would become the genesis of this book .

“You know the look a baby gets on his face the first time he tastes chocolate? That’s what a good horse day feels like — and that’s what keeps us coming back for more!”

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Tagged: Clinton Anderson

Want to watch a horse diagnose CEO disease?

Thank you, Dallas Morning News, for a great job portraying The Smart Woman’s Guide to Midlife Horses! Read it at http://dallasne.ws/qjHmBn

Special thanks to Rick Lamb for a delightful radio interview and an enlightening male perspective on my book!

Want to develop some mad core strength? Trot around for two hours on a snippy horse. Lather, rinse, and repeat.

Meet Kendra and her horse, Topper, the horse formerly known as Lyle. Why the name change? She asked, he answered. The rest, is mind-opening history.

Jana’s vet told her to treat her horse just like she treats her husband. What could THAT possibly mean?

Are my shorts on upside down? Ten years ago, this same pair was tight in the legs and big in the waist. Midlife can be so cruel.

Thanks, Dallas Morning News, for a fun interview and shoot! Look for the story in Our Town July 25!

Just interviewed by the Horse Radio Network’s Horses in the Morning Show. Who knew being on live radio could be such fun?

The magic of this midlife horse thing? On a good day, it feels like the look on a baby’s face when he tastes chocolate for the very first time.