Is that fear lurking behind your dream? Come find out how facing down hidden fear opens the door to forgotten dreams
Sometimes the thing that stops you from rediscovering and reinventing those favorite old dreams is that thing very few of us want to talk about — and even fewer are willing to admit. It may disguise itself as any one of (or several) excuses: not enough time, not enough money, too old, too tired, physical challenges, health challenges, geographic challenges.
Or it may not make any excuses at all, but choose instead to sit in the quiet corners of our minds, smirking at us for even thinking about revisiting a forgotten dream.
Yep. You guessed it. We’re talking about fear. If your dream happens to be horses, they do come with a treasure trove of things to worry about. (Don’t even get me started on what these might be.) And, if for some reason you aren’t aware of all these things there are to be afraid of, there are always plenty of well-meaning others in your life to point them out. (Again, don’t get me started.)
On the bright side, says Denise Barrows of Practical Equine Solutions, horses also provide us with a perfect opportunity to learn how to recognize, appreciate, and then face down fear to safely and confidently move forward on whatever our dream may be. “I think a lot of women at this time of life are sort of hiding out from fear,” Denise says. “Horses give us great practice at overcoming fear or other obstacles because they read our emotions and know exactly how we are really feeling, so it’s impossible to lie to them — even if we’re really good at lying to ourselves or others.” Denise says that once we own up to our fear (whatever it is and however debilitating it may be), we can then sit down and figure out the specific (and often) baby steps it will take to work through it safely and effectively.
And Denise knows. She began her business, Practical Equine Solutions, four years ago when she realized how many “regular” people (mostly women over 40) out there were having “trouble with their horses.” And while she is an accomplished and experienced horse trainer, the trouble she most often discovered was not with the horses. “When people deny or make excuses for their fear, it doesn’t go away,” she says, “and the horse always knows it’s there. (And, I might add, acts up accordingly.) In helping my clients get safely to the other side of their fear to achieve their horse-related goals, it more often than not benefits them in other areas of their life as well.”
Denise admits that she, herself, had to work though her own fear when launching this specific a business in the crowded horse trainer and clinician industry. But she knew this need was real, and with her own desire to help “regular” people as fuel, she walked the walk she now coaches others on every day. “I knew what I wanted to do,” she recalls, “but like so many others who deny their fear, I just kept letting life get in the way. Then one day I decided to just do it. And just like I tell every single one of my clients, I broke it down into the tiniest action steps I could think of, and then I marched through them, one by one. As I worked through each step, none of it was as scary or daunting as I thought it would be — nor did it require the major transformation I imagined. It was all inside of me all along, just as it is for most of the people I work with.”
What is this fear-busting process and how can you turn it loose on the lurking fears holding you back from your dreams?
Come to the Dust Off Your Dreams Women’s Retreat at the spectacular Wildcatter Ranch Resort and Spa in Graham, Texas, April 13-15 and find out for yourself. Denise is one of six outstanding presenters who have teamed up to help put you on the path to rediscovering your favorite old dreams.
Want to know more about The Smart Woman’s Guide to Midlife Horses? Click here to view book trailer!